The other night, I made my son and daughter hug.

They didn’t exactly sprint toward each other. It was one of those sibling moments — eye rolls, half smiles. A little resistance.

But I reminded them:

You’re for each other and you do love each other.

Ever since Parker became a big brother, I’ve told him his job is to protect Ella. Not in a heavy way. Not in a macho way. But in a steady way.

And as he’s grown, that message has grown too.

Parker knows he is here to bless women and children.
To use your strength for good.
To step in and serve when the moment calls for it.

I’ve seen that play out in small, ordinary moments.

In a parking lot, a first-time mom stood bewildered, trying to figure out how to get her newborn into the backseat. The car beside her had parked too close, blocking the door where the base was installed.

It was one of those moments most people walk past. Parker didn’t. He stepped in, stood by with the baby while she pulled her car forward, and made sure she could safely secure her child.

No spotlight.
No applause.
Just service.

Watching them hug — even if I nudged it along — I couldn’t help but think: this is where it begins.

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Proverbs 18:24

“A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.”

For years, I did what many of us do — I interpreted this verse quickly.
Jesus sticks closer than a brother. Amen. Close the book.

But tonight, I wanted to revisit it. I slowed down and considered that single word: friend.

Because the verse isn’t just theological — it’s practical.
It’s about the weight of friendship in real life.

It means deep, loyal, intentional friendship is more valuable than having many superficial acquaintances — even surpassing familial bonds.

And that hits differently when you don’t have a biological brother.

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The Standard Was Set Early

As we approach the seven-year anniversary of losing my father, I’m reminded of something simple:

My dad wasn’t just my dad he modeled friendship.

He was my best man at my wedding.
He would tell me,

“Phil, if you find someone who wants more for you than they want for themselves — hold on tight. That’s rare.”

He didn’t just say that. He lived it.

He gave time.
He gave talent.
He gave resources.
He gave belief.
And he shared his faith freely, and never stopped pointing me toward the Good Lord.

He even quietly helped fund a guitar or two I probably shouldn’t have bought when money was tight.

He embodied what Propelyourdream means.
He genuinely wanted to see my dreams come to life.

That reminds me of this quote:

“The greatest good you can do for another is not just to share your riches, but to reveal to him his own.” -Benjamin Disraeli

That was my dad.

He believed in things in me before I saw them myself.

And yet — even with all that — closeness can cloud perspective. Familiarity has a way of muting appreciation. Living under the same roof often times creates friction. There were seasons where I didn’t fully grasp the weight of who he was in my life.

But that’s the beauty of hindsight.
You begin to see what you were standing next to.

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The Mentors and the Uncles

My dad used to say:

“Young men need a lot of uncles around them — Men with different skills, different traits, different strengths.”

I’ve been blessed with those men.

Mentors who asked hard questions.
Men who were for me.
Men who let me watch up close — their work, their discipline, what was possible.
Men further down the road who had weathered storms and could warn me about the rocks ahead.

Friendship isn’t just shared laughter.
Sometimes it’s shared wisdom.

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What Is a Friend, Really?

Webster’s Dictionary says a friend is:
“One attached to another by affection or esteem.”

Affection says, I care about you.
Esteem says, I respect you.
Value says, You matter to me.

When all three are present, you don’t just have company — you have loyalty.

But Proverbs gives a warning too — many companions can lead to ruin.

You can have a lot of people around you and still be alone.
You can have access to many and depth with few.

And we’ve all heard it:

You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.

So choose wisely.

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Categories of Friends

As I reflect, I’m realizing there are different types of friends in a man’s life:

• OG Friends – The ones who knew you before you were polished.
• Growth Friends – The ones who sharpen you.
• Seasonal Friends – Assigned for a chapter.
• Mentor Friends – Further down the road.
• Battle Friends – The ones who go to war with you.
• Mat Carriers – The ones who drag you back to Jesus when you can’t walk yourself.

That last one comes from the story in the Gospels where the paralyzed man is lowered through the roof to reach Jesus. His friends refused to let obstacles win. They carried him.

That’s friendship.

Not because it was easy.
Not because it was expected.
But Because it mattered.

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They Show Up

If I had to name one defining trait of a real friend, it would be this:

They show up.

When my father passed, the calls went out — and the ones who truly mattered were already in motion.

Not to fix anything.
Not to have the right words.
Just to be there.

That’s loyalty.

And then there are friends who show up in different ways — not only beside you, but ahead of you.

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An Unexpected Brotherhood

And then there’s Mario.

I first met Mario briefly at my parents’ church Calvary Chapel Jacksonville Florida in 1999.

Years later (2013), my dad pointed the way again:

“You should really know Mario and connect with that guy. He’s in real estate.”

At the time, I was grinding in corporate America while trying to side-hustle a real estate brokerage from the corner of my desk.

A few calls turned into more conversations.

An invite to his naval retirement ceremony at Naval Station Mayport turned into a deeper connection. I brought my camera and captured the day — not realizing I was capturing the beginning of something much bigger.

Then he invited me to my first event with National Association of Residential Property Managers in Baltimore.

That season changed my life. It truly was a season of something special and there was,

Growth.
Learning.
Connection.
Momentum.

What I soon started to see was Mario modeled leadership — not as a badge, but as service. From local board involvement to national roles, he didn’t run alone. He made room and started to pull me along.

This past year, when he was sworn in as our board president at NEFAR, he stood on stage sharing his vision and reflecting on where he had come from. Somewhere in that message, he mentioned our friendship. It was unexpected. He didn’t have to. But he did. I sat there grateful — for the friendship more than the mention.

Then Came the Storms

Because growth isn’t free.

Through fair housing audits, IRS audits, legal threats, and the weight of running a difficult business — he’s been a backboard. A sounding board. A warrior.

On the worst day of my life, he ran toward it. Before I even understood what was unfolding, he moved to stand between me and what was ahead.

Just before sunrise on the morning of my father’s Celebration of Life, Mario stood and honored his military service as the bugle played and the flag was folded behind him. His words were prepared, sharp, and deeply meaningful. It remains one of the greatest gifts a friend has ever given me.

And in the chaos of life and business storms, he still will always remind me and say:

“If the Lord is for you, who can be against you?” Romans 8:31

That’s a battle friend.

That’s someone who wants to go to war for you — not against you.

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The Deeper Meaning

Maybe Proverbs 18:24 isn’t just about Jesus — though ultimately, He is the Friend who never fails.

Maybe it’s also a call.

Be that friend.

Be the man who wants more for others than for himself.
Be the mat carrier.
Be the one who shows up.
Be the mentor.
Be the uncle.
Be the battle brother.

Because in the end, it won’t be the crowd that carries you.

It will be a few.

And if you find one who sticks closer than a brother — hold on tight.