Dad – One’s Father

Father – 
To be the creator, founder, or author of; originate.
To perform the tasks or duties of a male parent; act paternally:

My Dad (Donald Philip Scarborough, aka Panch) on this day would have been celebrating his 74th Birthday had he not passed away a short 48 days ago on a cold brisk 42-degree morning, shortly after the 7:07 sunrise Valentines Day in Jacksonville, Florida. 

I describe this day in detail because I will never forget it. I won’t forget how the morning started and how that day ended and just about every detail in between down to the minute. 

When the one who propelled you into this world leaves, every detail in that day becomes sharply in focus and the cares of this world become very dim and blurry.   The day to day trappings of paying bills, doing deals and running from here and there have absolutely no significance. 

To say I am experiencing a loss is an understatement.

I lost my Dad, my best man at my wedding, my power source of propulsion. The steady pedal to the medal of wisdom, guidance, compassion, empathy, and love. He did this effortlessly because he had his compass pointed and permanently set true north.  This setting was always pointed to what truly mattered and that was on eternal things, the ones that last and don’t fade. 

Yes, I am broken hearted, sad, angry and a mix of other emotions.  However, I know emotions are gauges and not guides. These gauges show a mix of sadness and joy. The sadness because on this day I will not be able to play to him a happy birthday on my guitar with my signature ending of “Tis so sweet to trust in Jesus”.  I do have joy because I am the lucky one who truly experienced the amazing example of what a Father should do and should be for a child.  But it goes way beyond just that because My Dad Gave relentlessly to others no matter what. He gave passed the point of comfortable and he always gave good and perfect gifts.  He truly was a man that “Kept His Faith” and “Walked The Walked”.  I believe this perfect mix of joy & sadness equals gratefulness.    I am eternally grateful for the amazing man my Father showed me and others to be …  A Man after God’s own Heart. 

Remember yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery and today is a Gift from God, which is why we call it a present. 

As you propel your dream this very day I ask you to concentrate on two things.  One is how can you truly be present with those around you because being present leads to many great memories which is the best we get to take & keep.  Second is what one of my Dad’s gift can you give to someone else.  Remember it shouldn’t be all about us but about others.  I hope you want to join me and be a Go-Giver and not a Go-Getter.  

This past Saturday, March 30th, we honored my Father for all the things he was this side of heaven and it was truly a Celebration of Life. 

Here is a link to the tribute video of all things about my Dad.   In future posts I will be sharing about all the Gifts I have received from him and they are not the ones put into a box with a bow on it but gifts we get to experience in this journey we call life that leads to the Ultimate Gift. 

Through one of the saddest times in my life, I’ve come to realize that people want to provide comfort.  I’ve learned that one should not use  “I know what you’re going through” because you will never know.  Your journey is your journey and each person has their own journey.  As we mourn or go through difficult times in life; we appreciate comforting words but there is no way anyone knows exactly what other people are going through at any given time.  Just be there for them, tell them how much they mean to you, listen to them and share fond memories because that’s what truly helps a hurting heart.